Prayer and going to Haiti

A few weeks ago I read Wayne Grudem's chapter on Prayer from Sytematic Theology.  Since then I have meditated upon the power and importance of praying according to God's will.  Upon this topic Grudem points us to Jesus' example, "Jesus teaches us to pray, "Your will be done" (Matt 6:10), and he himself gives us an example, by praying in the garden of Gethsemane, "Nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will" (Matt 26:39)" (p 382).  Jesus' soul was troubled and sorrowful, even to death, driving him to fall on his face in prayer!  This is a posture of abject humility, from which Jesus lays his life before his Father in complete honesty and surrender - solidifying the earnestness of his words "Nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will."  Even in Jesus' most earnest and sorrowful prayers, he surrenders entirely to God's will as his ultimate request.

How should Jesus' example translate into my life?  Prayer is not just about getting what I want, but about making my requests known to God (my loving Father) while seeking that my desires align with His will.  We are told to delight ourselves in the Lord, and He will gives us the desires of our heart.  When our hearts desire what is godly and pure, He is able to bless us by fulling our requests, if that is His sovereign will.  Concerning God's response to our prayers Grudem writes:

Sometimes God will grant what we have asked.  Sometimes he will give us deeper understanding or change our hearts so that we are led to ask something differently.  Sometimes he will not grant our request at all but will simply indicate to us that we must submit to his will (see 2 Cor 12:9-10).

Concerning Grudem's last point, God, in His wisdom, at times will not grant our requests, teaching us to submit to his will.  In 2 Corinthians Paul repetitively pleaded with the Lord to remove a thorn from his flesh.  God's response was one of fatherly authority, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."  To this, Paul responds, "Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weakness, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.  For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities.  For when I am weak, then I am strong" (8-10).  Paul grew in a more accurate view of both himself and God as he learned submission and humility in light of God's supremacy.

For months I have prayed for an opportunity to go to Mumbai, India this summer.  I asked, and I kept on asking.  I followed God's word when He said, "And I tell you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you" (Luke 11:9).  I knocked, and I kept on knocking.  But God did not answer my requests by granting me what I had asked.  He did not grant my request at all.  Rather, He indicated that I must submit to His sovereignty and be willing to go anywhere.  So, now I'm left following Paul's example - being content with God's response, although it is not what I had hoped for.

It seems that God is leading me, not towards Mumbai, but towards Haiti this summer.  I feel ill-prepared, uncertain, and confused.   Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weakness, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.  The redemption of the world, and of a people to Himself, are God's plans and desires.  He cares and knows far more about His redemption than I'm capable of.  Thus, I can trust that His plans are far better than my own.  As Jesus exemplified, I also now say, "not as I will, but as you will."